Take your passion and make it happen

We went to see Flashdance at the National Arts Centre tonight.  It was very good.  I enjoyed it though not as much as I thought I would.  It was long and dragged a little at times.  But the dancing was definitely amazing.  And you do get that amazing rush to hear music that you know, live on-stage, in such a big production. 

They changed the story a lite bit, but ultimately, the story is about following through on your dreams and working hard. It is a good reminder to me that I have to follow through on my dreams, which is writing, and I haven't been doing that lately, either writing in this blog or starting the serious fiction writing that I want to do, and that I haven't time to do in the last 11 years, but that I promised myself I would do.

I have become absorbed in my new job, trying to learn tax policy and trying to make a good impression, which is difficult because I have been trying to maintain my leaving time of 5:00, which nobody at Tax seems to do.  And they all have little kids, younger than mine, and they are all lovely people, but they all say that that their spouse picks up their kids, and they are content to see their children, even their babies, for an hour a day.  And if they are not really content, they accept it.  And I wish I could tell them that that is wrong. 

I have to admit that I have spent time on the weekends and sometimes in the evenings working from home.  Because there is a lot of work to do.  And I want to a great job.  And I want to show them that I can do a great job without having to stay late every night (because then they can't complain, right?).  And I want to advance. Yes, I want it all.  And I think there is no reason I can't.  And that we can't all have it all, if we all decide to live like that.

But back to my dream about writing.  I suppose I can't do it when I am trying to draft my costing methodology after hours.  So maybe I do have to make some choices.  I can do my job and be with my family.  And I can do a little bit more.  But what will it be?  Spend time with friends?  Chop vegetables for my salad?  Go to yoga class?  Help Amrita with her piano?  Try to sort out who's going to the dance with whom in Aveen's grade 6 class?  Take a nap?  Do a little more work?  Watch an episode of Glee?  (Thank you, D & J for the great recommendation!)  Send an e-mail to a friend?  Volunteer to go on a school field trip?  Start writing my great novel?

Any of those choices would be great and right.  Each day, I can choose something different.  One day, I hope I will choose to write, and little by little, be closer to that dream.  Until I do, I will be living my other dreams.

There are flowers in my salad

It was all right!

After two weeks of waiting, Jaime and I trudged to the General Hospital. 

"The doctor is running an hour late," the receptionist cheerfully announced when we got there.

Oh great. 

I tried to find a magazine, but couldn't find anything.  "The selection isn't very good, is it?"  someone said to me.

No.

I walked up and down and the halls for a while, because I don't like to sit still, especially in hospital waiting rooms.  Especially when I am waiting for test results.  I looked out the window.  Two interns were sitting outside chatting.  One was eating an apple.  Another had a coffee.  At another table, another doctor/intern/nurse was eating lunch.

At a certain point, I wasn't even worried anymore.  I was BORED out of my mind.  I was so bored that I played maze games on my iPhone.  My kids would have been so surprised because I never play games. 

Finally, after almost two hours, I was called.

"Hi.  I'm a third year student.  I'm just going to ask you a few questions before the doctor sees you.  Sorry for the wait."

Which wait?

She proceeded to ask me a million questions.  She didn't find any of my answers interesting.  (Good.)  

I am having a pain in my leg.

"Can't help you with that.  Go see your family doctor."

(I did.  He didn't really care.)

"Anything else?"

"Well, I really want to know my ultrasound result."

"The doctor will be in to talk to you about that."

More waiting.

Finally, the doctor arrived in the room.  A locum, replacing my actual doctor who is on sabbatical.  (Doctors go on sabbatical?)

More questions.

Finally, "Everything looks fine."

Why was it so hard to tell me??

"We'll do another test in 6 months."  Because you can never be too careful with kidneys, apparently.  Jeesh, they are more careful with this than the other thing.

"I'm not driving you for the test in 6 months," Jaime informs me.

The rest of the week has been exceptionally normal.  School, homework, piano, and getting used to my new job.   

In my latest bag of leafy greens from Nicastro are pretty yellow and orange flowers.

"Do we eat them?"  Jaime and I wonder.  "They probably wouldn't leave them in there if you couldn't eat them, would they?"  We reason. 

This is all the adventure I want for now.